Daze Within a Dream I Know

aria lee kurbat

There’s a daze within a dream I know

days a place my head may go

spinning stars and shaking trees

childhood memories, skinning knees

 

My present self, the roots of past

Future goals and current path

All still burning, all still burning

Twisting, turning, searching, yearning

 

A daughter on the way to me

extensions of who I can be

 

I’ll search within the sea I’ve sailed

Dig through treasures, sought and failed

Light a way for you to see

Burn off all the fuel in me

 

I am a branch for you to swing

A tree of shelter, not a king

We’ll dance until the moon wakes up

I’ll fill you to the brim

 

Your cup of life is overflowing

my thirst for you: ever growing

this daze within a dream I know?

it’s nearly time to start the show

 

You’ll bloom and burn with passion

skin your knees with fashion

A mother’s drive

A father’s wording

learning, earning, serving


Dani woke me up the other morning to remind me we'll be parents in a month. If you've ever been here, you know it's roller coaster. Don't get me wrong, I don't know if I've ever been more excited. But there's an urgency to this chapter. We're building cribs and painting walls. Doing the best we can with the most we can.

And I'm looking within because the stage is set.

We're having a beautiful daughter and all I want to do is guide her to God. Not push. Not shove. Not scare. I just want to experience her walk with hope.

But sometimes I get scared. They say girls, especially, develop their image of God through their relationship with their dad. It's funny how that can put a spin on things. It's intimidating if I think about it too much - kind of puts me in a daze. But then I remember that all of my life up until this point has been a training grounds. All of my life has been a journey to better understand the best author around. 

All of my chapters help begin her story.

Way I see it, my role as a father is to guide and provide --  so I've been taking stock of the lessons I've learned and truths that set me free. Somewhere in there, it's all starting to make sense.

See ya soon, Aria. 

I'll be waiting with Samwise and mom.


I don't always write sappy things about being a dad. Click below for tales of adventure.